Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize