I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
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