check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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