You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I think a kid would responsible me up
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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