...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
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