yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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