my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
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