Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize