Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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