Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
this is an emotional support booty call
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
