Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
where are you?
Hypothermia
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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