I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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