Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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