The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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