I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
