check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
