I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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