mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
