can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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