My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Randomize
