Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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