Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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