Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
