I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
