bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Randomize