Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I think my moral compass just broke
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
