a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
whose ass print is on the piano?
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Randomize
