so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize