Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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