you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize