In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
