dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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