He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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