my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
