Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
