Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
