Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize