Dual....:-)
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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