first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
