The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Randomize
