dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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