the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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