so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
