I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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