i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
