i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
high people should be assigned attendants
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
