Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Randomize
