Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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