At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Randomize
