$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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