I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Randomize
