so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize